The European Chronicles 2026.8 - Kaltern an Der Winestrasse
Is This Really Italy?
Thomas, the owner of the Alpenhotel Schlussel in Andermatt, mingles with his guests every morning over breakfast. Making sure everyone is happy, enjoying their time, making suggestions on things to do and see; it is a "high touch" hotel service environment that is truly unique. Thomas sits down with me on my last day and asks where I'm headed. "Italia, over several passes, to Kaltern," I say. "Kaltern, in Sudtirol, that is not Italian, is all German, you know?"
He was 100% right, even for Sudtirol. I say that knowing the "back and forth" history of Sudtirol, and how every town has both an Italian and German name, how the heritage "leans German" and the area today is semi-autonomous. Usually, you hear both languages (along with others because this is Europe, after all). Here, though, German...not a word of Italian in any of the shops or restaurants, not on the street, nor from any of my neighbors at the Milleniumshof.
So the answer is, Nein. But I'm getting ahead of myself. First is the ride.
To get there, I'm heading over 5 Passes: Oberalp, Guilia, Bernina, Tonale and Mendola. It will be a long day.
Relive 'Cinque Passi To Kaltern'
It was a long, but fun ride. Beautiful passes, not a lot of traffic. Ending at the Milleniumshof, a VRBO-like rental, right in the middle of a vineyard.
But this, this here, is the key to happiness right now:
Like last year, Europe is experiencing another crushing heat wave:
It's HOT, DAMN HOT, REAL HOT, mid to upper 90s, no AC to speak of, anywhere. The average high here this time of year is 70 degrees.
There are features that keep this place reasonably cool. First, it's all concrete, which holds the temperature. You have to keep it from getting hot, that means shutters and shades during the day.
Power operated metal shutters that also darken:
Big double doors to open up at night, with a wonderful cross-breeze.
Let the cool air in at night; trap it inside during the day. Repeat.
Relive 'Milleniumshof Loop 1'
The entire area is vineyards and apple orchards.
As I type, over coffee and a cornetto, it is forecast to be 97 today. The fact is, I don't handle the heat (or the cold, for that matter) like I used to. I'm now a delicate flower. This place would be fantastic at the "average normal" 70 degrees. Spectacular at 80, even tolerable at 90. At 97, the pool beckons, and I can stream Motogp from Assen. 😎.
There are other ways to reach the mountaintop...one of the steepest funiculars in Europe: the Mendelbahn. Free with my guest card.
And you have to love what it says on the website:
A short walk up to the station. Really demonstrates how every backyard, every spare piece of land is covered in vineyards or apple orchards.
The station.
It is STEEP!
You disembark at a very nice cafe with an outdoor deck, adjacent to the top of Mendel pass. I've been over this pass several times, including on the ride here. Had no idea this cable car even existed. It is down a little side road, and the funicular itself is hidden by the cafe.
Gotta love it: make room for stickers!
The funicular is hidden on the other side of this cafe. You just must know. 😎
Spectacular deck that looks down on the pass road.
Good food too!
Cafe is pretty nice inside as well, with a decent wine selection. Of course. 😎
Heading down.
The town is a short walk, all downhill, which means you know what coming back. 😂
Excellent restaurant.
How to make a chain link fence look good. Why can't we do this?
Speaking of fences, these are all around the pool area at the Milleniumshof. A simple frame with wire. I love it; we could have used something like this at The Wine Shack. 😂
Gone, but not forgotten. 😎
This IS a wine region.
I stopped into a wine bar for a tasting, was handed a full-page sheet of wines on offer. I asked to taste 3 different Lagrein, a red local to the Alto-Adige and hard to find in the US, especially in Tucson. Three different price points, three different vineyards, three different growing altitudes. 25, 45 and 65 euro per bottle. I actually liked the middle cost one best...go to pay. 3 euro. Tastings are 1 euro per glass. Incredible.
Bob...this 2CV tucked away, just for you!
All knodel, all the time. Good wine. 😎
This is a kitchen and bathroom remodeling business, tucked in among the houses, vineyards and orchards. With a bat cave, of course.
The Tools For The Job
It would have been a little weird to take a picture, so here it is in words.
Five different restaurants, all the waitstaff have the same "tool belt." Leather, sits on your hips, just like you imagine. Same 3 tools: an electronic "order pad," you order, they punch it in, seems to go directly to the kitchen. A "money pouch," very standard in Europe, fans out with bills and coins, allows them to make change on the spot when you pay. An electronic card reader, same idea, you are able to pay on the spot. And...wait for it...all the waitstaff wait on everyone, i.e., you don't have "your waiter." Want to add to your order? Get another drink? Any waitperson can help you, they just enter it in on the pad. Same for payment, anyone can help you, pay on the spot, card or cash. So, so, so simple. Five different restaurants did it exactly the same way. I've seen each of these "tools" individually here before, but not the triad. Makes so much sense.
Ciao!
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